Things that are annoying me in Fanfic

( A list of things that have me grinding my teeth. )

Sword & Song Fragment

Here is what I've got done on the first chapter.

I'm specifically looking for input on how well Heneter is set up as a character, how interested you are in what happens next, if you think she should eventually get involved with Nakhti far, far in the future, and how much, if any, effort should I put into details of the preparations for leaving and the voyage.

General comments are also welcome.

 

( Sword & Song (Working Title) )